My heart is heavy as I sit in a dark hospital room, my sleeping child on my chest. In a million years, I would never have imagined being were I am today. I remember thinking as I passed by a child with what seemed to be a very serious illness, pale, covering her head with a pretty silk scarf, look the other way. It was too scary to imagine what her mother's heart was feeling, will I see her graduate kindergarten, go to her first dance, wipe away her tears on her wedding day? It was easier for me not to even think about it, ignore the Saint Jude's commercials, simply out of fear of the unknown, fear that, "what if" it was my baby.
As I think back now, tears fill my eyes, just the thought of being "normal" again, seems so far from my grasp. When you see your life as a dream, of course everything looks perfect, big house, prince charming, healthy children. Of course, life in reality is only pieces of your dreams. But, the ones you prayed for, sometimes don't come true. This is a story of a Mother's journey, a journey into the unknown, with her beautiful baby.
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